Trauma and the need to strive

Until about a month ago, the only lasting legacy of Arnold Schwarzenegger's life and work for me was that seeing a pair of dungarees made me think of that cute kid in Kindergarten Cop who 'needed to go to the bathroom' but couldn't 'get these things off!' So I was surprised to find that the documentary Arnold was activating my trauma specialist antennae, and felt like pretty good CPD! 

You may be aware that Arnold has engaged in three separate careers – professional bodybuilding, acting and politics – knocking all three out of the park. We are talking Mr Universe, $4 billion worldwide movie revenue and being elected a State Governor… twice! If I'd been seeing someone for an assessment with such levels of success across these varied areas, I would have been wondering about their background and motivating factors. And as I watched the four episodes of Arnold, I totted up at least a 7/10 score on the Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) scale.

Whilst diagnoses aren't always popular or helpful, perhaps we can begin to understand someone's presentation through a trauma lens. 

When I am with high-striving clients, I often explore their motivating drivers with them, and how it feels when they are just spending time by themselves. It seems Arnold only learned to find peace with this as he got older. On marrying into what (at least on the surface in the documentary) seemed to be a loving family, he learned what a family ought to feel like. Schwarzenegger reportedly tried as hard as he could to strive for stability for them, recognising this was something he'd not had. His own upbringing involved being parented by an ex-Nazi officer Father who pitted him and his brother against one another.

I was struck by Arnold's desire to have long-lasting wealth. Suddenly achieving fame and money in the 70s and 80s could have led to a variety of maladaptive coping strategies, but instead he chose property investing – another income stream he seems to have taken stratospheric. 

He may not look like your average pensioner, so it's hard for me to get my head around the fact that my own Mr Universe – my late Father – was only 17 months older than Arnie. All told, some of the closing scenes of him working out in his gym, and of him and his daughter doing some artwork together, just made me feel quite sad. I found myself hoping he is now able to feel calm, connected and proud of his achievements, with less need to strive. I wonder how his life might have been different had an appropriately qualified psychologist come into his life at key stages of childhood, young adulthood and beyond.

Give the show a go, it might help you when working with clients and families who have experienced trauma. I'd better dash as I'm wearing a dungaree dress… gonna need some help with the toggles. 

Reviewed by Dr Marianne Trent of Good Thinking Psychological Services; Chartered Psychologist and Host of The Aspiring Psychologist Podcast.